Sharing My Dreams

Your life is never the same after you have a child.

Those are the words that echoed in my mind when I first discovered I was pregnant. Any hopes or dreams that I formerly held seemed to dim at the thought of this new chapter of parenthood. Traveling the world? Nope. Spontaneous weekend trips? No more. Photography excursions? Think again. Eating out? No. These were the potential, yet very palpable losses I dreaded. Perhaps these seem petty in light of the beginning of a new life, but these things, these dreams, brought me joy, they added sparks to my life. How could my mundane life garner any color without these things added into the mix? It seemed as if the very core of my being was required to dramatically change for the worse in order to become a proper mother.

But those thoughts, of course, were lies. Since becoming a mother, I have realized that the course of my life is largely influenced by my steering. That is to say, while mothering a child has called for some major changes, such as endlessly caring for another human being, it still calls for a great measure of creativity beyond attending to my daughter’s basic needs. Therefore, if going out to eat seems like a good idea to my husband and I, we just bring our baby along with us. Or if taking a day trip to San Francisco tickles our fancy, we pack up the car with a picnic and drive down together.  It turns out, there is still room for doing the things I love in the context of a family of three. 

And I think that is how it is supposed to be. Certainly parenting requires great sacrifice on many levels, it requires a kind of selflessness I did not previously exercise. However as the majority of parenting is executed through example, living out my dreams and joys teaches my child how to dream, how to enjoy the beauty of the world, and how to exercise her creativity in every stage of life. She can learn that while life is about sacrifice, it is also about exercising the gifts she’s been given and enjoying life in ways that make God smile.

So yes, my life has changed since having my baby, but instead of viewing it as a negative part of my life, I now see it as a beautiful and positive alteration.

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Pictures from a day trip to San Francisco